It’s a certain brother’s birthday this week, so I was going to write him a mushy card and send it to him. And then things got crazy here (can I still call it “crazy” when I no longer remember what non-crazy is like?) so I’m going to blog about him instead. Sorry, Joe, I know it will make your skin crawl, but I’m going to talk about you to the world. :-D
If I had to pick one word to describe Joe, it would be “hero”. Not because he’s saved people from burning buildings or anything, but he’s the kind of person who would. Or ensure that someone else did. He is very protective of children, for example, and they don’t even have to be his own. The last time I was visiting Joe and Lisa in suburban Seattle, we were all out for a walk when a teenager who was skateboarding fell, making a distinct crunching noise, and then just laid on the cement rather than getting up. Aside from checking for traffic before he crossed the street, Joe wasted no time in running over to see that the kid was okay.
One of the clearest memories I have from my childhood was Joe, about 7 or 8 at the time, rushing into the house from the barn (where we sometimes had many, many cats), and bursting out, “Come quick! [Insert name of forgotten cat here] is having kittens!” Like I was a veterinarian? I guess, since I was almost a year and a half older, he figured I had to be good for something. And he really wanted to help.
I don’t really have a lot of heroic tales of Joe’s life before Lisa and the twins. I’m sure there are many other examples of this tendency, but for several years, I've considered Joe a hero-in-waiting. And then he met this beautiful creature in some hokey country line-dancing bar, and spent several months patiently working to win her heart and to help her gain the confidence to believe in love again.
But I think where Joe’s heroic nature has finally found fulfillment is without a doubt with his kids. I can’t imagine a father who is more involved, more committed, or more hands-on than my brother. A lot of men would put on a show about being a family guy but just disappear under the demands of twins. Not Joe. The first time I visited, he barely let me change a diaper because it was his job, his responsibility, and he didn’t begrudge it. Joe recently wrote on his blog an amazing story on his blog as he was writing advice for other parents expecting twins:
Talk to your babies before they are born. It's an amazing thing to do, and it does help. Greet them with the same phrase every time you do it. Mine was "Hi, it's Daddy". When my daughter, Lorelai was born, and she was crying and screaming in the hall while her brother was on his way out, I was able to go up to her bassinet, and say 'Hi Lorelai, it's Daddy', and she looked up at me, grabbed my finger with her little fingers and stopped crying. The nurses just went 'Wow.' It was a pretty amazing moment, and something I'll never forget.
Let there be no doubt, Joe is already a hero to those babies.
Now might I suggest that you go wish my brother a happy birthday? :->
2 comments:
This is an awesome tribute! Joe asked me if I had read it last night, and I could tell that he was touched by it. Thanks for making his/our day!
Awww, I'm so glad to hear that, Lisa! It was 100% sincere.
I think you've also seen the hero in Joe's nature, and I'm so glad you've let him be that for you. :)
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